Dreams arent better when you wake
by Lostinmywords05
Summary: Amy gets pushed to the brink. This story includes most of the Everwood cast
1. Dreams arent better when you wake

Episode starts The episode starts with Dr. Linda Abbot and Dr. Andy Brown eating a picnic while Delia, Ephram, and 2 redheaded, unidentified children play hide-and- go-seek in the woods near by. Andy and Linda kiss and say I love you and then stare into each other's eyes as they reminisce. LINDA: Do you remember how our relationship started? (smiles) ANDY: Yes, you were just coming back from Congo and you had just started working at your brothers office when I took interest in you. I came to your house to help you unpack and I tried to kiss you. And then I gave you all of those gifts and you quietly ignored me and then after more gifts you attempted to reject me. LINDA: Only to fail miserably and end up telling you that I cared for you.... ANDY: and you know what's the worst part?  
  
LINDA: Hmmm? ANDY: None of this will ever happen because you have HIV and you'll die a slow painful death, alone because you are incapable of loving someone. Not only that, people will fear you when the find out you have HIV and think that you are a slut because you slept with a dirty disease infected man. (Scene changes into Linda tossing and turning and groaning in bed) Linda awakes and turns over and cries. She rolls over and attempts to get out of bed only to end up on the floor crying. LINDA: Why...? Why God...why? (Scene changes into Amy Abbot and Collin Hart sitting on the rocks near the river where them and Bright would usually goof off) Amy and Collin are kissing and they break away. COLLIN: Amy, I love you. AMY: Oh, Collin I love you too. COLLIN: I must leave you though and we cant be together. The sunny sky turns dark and all the sound stops except for the violent thrashing of the wind. Collin runs and jumps off the rocks and you hear the sound of bones shattering. Amy awakes in her bed covered in sweat. She swallows a couple Zoloft from her night stand, closes her eyes (even though its day light), and returns to sleep. 


	2. heart ache and pain

(Scene changes into Linda's house) Linda is drinking some Chai tea and just sitting down to meditate. She folds her legs and assumes the Lotus position, trying to clear her mind. She is interrupted by visions of Andy kissing her and Amy yelling at her father and Amy being lost in New York. With her eyes still closed, you see Linda's eyebrow furrow in emotion and she gets up, unable to concentrate. (the scene changes into Dr. Brown fixing the sign outside of his office) He thinks about Linda and the kiss and helping her move and her rejecting with him. He gets down off the ladder and sees Linda park her car and walk into her office without saying a word to him. Linda walks in to her office and sits down to fill out paper work. She works and looks at the clock (time changes each time about an hour, but it goes very slowly and she continually looks). At noon Dr. Abbot enters the room to get his sister for lunch. HAROLD: So are you going to take a break and go for lunch? LINDA: No, I'm pretty busy. I've got a 1 o'clock and a 3 o'clock, plus all of these patient information forms to fill out. HAROLD: Ok, just make sure you take a break. Shortly after Harold leaves, Linda pauses from working and stares at the pictures on her brother's desk of Amy. Some of them are recent and some of them aren't, but mostly they just show a happy, energetic, young woman. Her eyebrows again furrow and she gathers her purse and car keys and walks out of the office in to her car. Linda drives to the Harold Abbot family house and to her surprise, she finds the door unlocked and walks in. LINDA: (checking to see who is in the house, she yells) Harry? Rose? Amy? Linda walks through the house looking in the living room, kitchen and then going upstairs. She hears a muffled sob and a moan of pain, and she sees that Amy's room is open a crack and she silently pushes if open. Amy is sitting with her back to her bed and you hear her gapped breathing and sobs of pain. She takes the razor blade in her hand and makes a huge gash on her right wrist which is already covered with small incisions from uncertainty. AMY:(muttering) I've been dying a little each day, now that your gone Collin. Linda gasps and Amy turns around. Shocked, Amy stands, backs away and tries to hide her wrist behind her back, as she stammers: AMY: wh-what are you doing here? LINDA: (fights to keep panic out of her voice) I was concerned about you Amy, now put down the razorblade. We need to get you to a hospital, before you bleed to death. Linda steps towards Amy, who steps backwards. Tears start to flow and Amy looks away and wipes them off her face, ashamed. AMY: As if you care!  
  
LINDA: (her eyes soften) Of course I care about you Amy! I love you so much. Your whole family loves you and they've been trying to help you, just like I am now. AMY (gives Linda a hard cold stare): Yeah right. None of you love me. You've hardly been here and you abandoned my dad when he needed you the most. You only care about yourself! And if my parents loved me so much, then why have they cut me off from any joy that I might have had? and if my parents loved me so much why am I imprisoned in my own house alone and left to die?  
  
LINDA: Amy- AMY: No! I hate you all! You'll leave me, just like you left my Dad...just like Collin. (Whispers as tears run down her face) But I'll win and leave you first... Amy takes a final slash at her opposite wrist and slides down the wall she has finally backed into. She is now just a pathetic crumple of a human being, balled up the floor. Linda walks towards Amy and embraces her, hugging her while she cries. LINDA: You know Amy, everyone has to die at a point but I promise you this; no one who loves you has ever wanted to leave you.  
  
~I'm trying to fix the formatting errors. Hope this is better~ 


	3. Who's willing to die?

Linda has a far off look, as she remembers that Amy is dying. Linda picks up Amy's struggling, hysterical body and makeshift wraps her wrists with some towels she found in Amy's bathroom. Amy stops struggling as she realizes that her Aunt is a lot stronger than her. Damn Yoga, Amy thinks in her head. Linda sets Amy in the backseat of her car and locks the doors. Amy tries to unlock the doors but she is too weak. Linda then takes Amy to see, surprisingly, not her Dad but Dr. Brown. Linda pulls up and honks the horn. Edna looks out of the window and greats them happily, but her enthusiasm falls short when she sees Amy balled up in the backseat. Edna and Dr. Brown rush downstairs. EDNA: Oh my dear God.... ANDY: What happened here? LINDA: I found her in her room with her wrists slit. I would've gotten here sooner but she struggled and wouldn't let me take her to the hospital. ANDY: How long has she been like this? LINDA: I don't know how long she's been bleeding but she made bigger slits in the last 15 minutes. Linda, Andy, and Edna take Amy's body upstairs and set it on the operating table. Amy attempts to get away and will not sit still for them to save her life. Edna and Linda hold her down while she is given a sedative and her wounds are wrapped again even though they have been makeshift wrapped by Linda already.  
  
AMY: (whispering before she falls asleep) Please let me die....why wont you let me die...? ANDY: She has not lost enough blood to die, but someone needs to get her parents so they can discuss what we are to do with Miss Abbot. Linda leaves and jogs across the street, bursts in to the abbot office. LINDA: (yelling) "Harry!?" HAROLD ABBOT: Well guess you thought you would take that lunch break...thought you'd just take the day off did ya?" LINDA: (ignoring his usual sarcastic comments): There's something you need to see. Harold's angry half smile is wiped off of his face when he heard the tone of her voice and sees the tears in her eyes. He follows her out of the office after telling his secretary to cancel all of their other appointments. Linda and Harold enter the office. LINDA: Harold, I'm sorry but there's something I have to tell you. HAROLD: What? What is it? LINDA: Its about Amy. Did you see her go to school today? HAROLD: No, she usually either leaves so late that we don't see or too early, sometimes I dont think she even goes. LINDA: She didn't go to school today. She stayed home and tried to kill herself. Harold's eyes fill with tears and he tries to fight them; he still can't lose face in front of his little sister. He had too much pride for that, but he couldn't stop them from falling down his cheeks. HAROLD: Is she ok? Did she die? Where is she? LINDA: She's going to be all right. I found her and got her here just in the nick of time. She's been given a sedative and is asleep with her wounds wrapped. If she had been left alone much longer than she might not be here. Harold and Amy walk into the operating room and Edna gives her son a hug. ANDY: She's going to be all right, but I think that you should watch her overnight; incase she tries anything to hurt herself again. HAROLD: (looking away, ashamed of his tears) Do you think I could have some alone time with my daughter? And will someone call Rose for me? Linda and Andy leave the room and Edna gives her son a pat on the back.  
  
EDNA: She'll be all right, son. Edna leaves the room and calls Rose who says she'll be over as fast as she can. Andy and Linda sit on the waiting room couch. ANDY: How did you find Amy? I mean, how did you know she was there and what was wrong? (Gives Linda a thoughtful look) LINDA: It's kind of like that feeling you get when you are performing surgery. I just knew something was wrong and I had to do something about it. Plus, there were all kinds of clues leading up to it. Amy tried to run away and she hardly went to school anymore. Her boyfriend hasn't talked to her much since her Dad yelled at him at Thanksgiving. I was very concerned for her after she said she hated everyone and everything. Mood stabilizers, like Zoloft, don't just help the pain; they numb you and make all feelings dull. So even when Amy was feeling joy, it wasn't extreme; but she did remember the sadness. She wanted to die so badly, it was terrifying. I've never seen Amy that way before, so hysterical and violent towards herself. I've never seen anyone who wanted to choose to die... Linda has a far away look on her face, as if she's thinking about something else. Tears of hurt are in her eyes and she blinks them back and swallows hard. ANDY: Are you ok? LINDA: I'm fine. I'm just scared. (Linda bows her head) I don't want to die.... Andy hugs her and you hear a loud crash. Amy is awake and is trying to get out of the office! She runs out of the office and her Dad grabs her. 


	4. To the rescue

Harold Abbot continued to hold a struggling Amy, until she looked her Aunt directly in the eye and spoke. AMY: (hysterically shouting) Why did you have to save me? WHY?! After her outburst, Amy struggled free and ran out of the office with speed no one knew she had. HAROLD yelling frantically: "AMY?!" ANDY: "We've got to get her back here before she does any further damage to herself." EDNA, using her best commanding-officer voice, gave the troops orders: "Ok. We'll split up and find her. Andy and Linda: you two get in Linda's car and try and find Amy. Ill call Irv and we'll call the police and notify Amy's friends. Harold, when Rose gets here go and search in all of the places you think she might be. Ill call Ephram and Bright to see if they have any ideas. The group separated and went their separate ways.  
  
Andy and Linda walked downstairs and Linda is shaking, even though she has a heavy coat on. ANDY, with concern: "Are you sure that you are ok?" LINDA, trying to sound convincing: "Yeah, Ill be all right." Linda wipes away the tears in her eyes, as they got to the car. ANDY: I'm going to drive; you seem a bit shaken up. Linda doesn't protest as she hands him the keys and sits down in the passenger seat. Andy starts the car and Linda still has a forlorn look on her face, as she stares out the window. First they drive to Amy's house and find nothing. Next they drive to the Mountain with the bench overlooking Everwood and Amy still isn't there, all this time they do not speak a word to each other. They drive around Everwood, for an hour or two. LINDA: (suddenly sitting up) Wait! I have an idea! ANDY: What is it? LINDA: Go to the River. Andy drove there but still no sign of Amy! Linda picked up her cell phone and started to dial. ANDY: "Who are you calling?" Linda signaled for him to hold on while she waited a couple of seconds and hung up the phone. LINDA: "Well, it seems that no one is at your house. They must be looking for Amy." ANDY: "Where else should we look?" LINDA, as if struck by a sudden realization: "I have one more idea!" Andy resumed driving and Linda gave him directions.  
  
The car stopped a little bit outside the town, in what seemed to be a forgotten graveyard, all except one headstone covered in many different flowers, gifts, and a weatherworn basketball jersey. Andy and Linda can see two distant figures next to the tombstone: one is a girl with a mass of long blonde hair with a fuzzy brown coat and a some jeans stained with blood and the other is a tall brunette boy with spiky hair wearing a tee shirt, black coat, and some kakis. The two people appear to be in some kind of argument. Linda rises to get out the car, but Andy puts his hand on her leg to stop her. ANDY, with a stern tone: "Let Ephram handle it; I think Amy will listen to him. She usually does."  
  
Over near Collin's grave, Ephram tries to persuade Amy to live. AMY, annoyed: "Ephram, stay out of this! Just leave me alone so I can end my pain!" EPHRAM, in a soothing tone: "Amy, you have so much to live for. Your beautiful and smart and so many people care about you." Amy, who was looking forlornly at Collin's grave, looked at Ephram who was looking at her with deep loving eyes. EPHRAM continued: "When I look into your eyes, beyond the sadness and anger, I see your pure heart and your loving soul and I know that you will make the right decision. Death is forever, and you don't want to be sorrowful for all eternity, do you?" Amy shook her head and gave the two embraced in a hard hug and Amy cried on Ephram's shoulder. In the car, Linda and Andy smiled at each other; they knew that Amy would be ok. They saw Ephram and Amy brake away and Amy giggle at a joke cracked by Ephram. Over her shoulder, Ephram saw his Dad in the car. He gave him an acknowledging head nod and took Amy's hand, as they turned and walked back into Everwood.  
  
~*~Thanks for the Reviews. Sorry it took so long for me to update! More will be coming soon -Lostinmywords05~*~ 


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